Missing You, Missing Me (You and Me Series Book 1) Page 3

  “Hey, I know how it is, being on the road all the time; with a perfect husband like yours.” He wasn’t even trying to hold in his sarcasm.

  “It’s just a jacket,” I said quietly. Adrian ran up behind me, grabbed my shoulders, and whipped me around. I silently thanked Adrian for his perfect timing.

  “You ready babe? This is already an epic night! If you’re good, I have a present for you,” he winked. Laughing, he turned to talk to Mark. A crew member came up and signaled us. I reached out to grab their hands and squeezed them tight.

  All at once we announced ourselves by bounding to the stage, running towards the screams. I grabbed the mic, and the music began pounding in my ears. The cheers from the fans energized me. My long hair hung in front of my face as I put the microphone up to the crowd to sing along with us.

  As I headbanged to the music, I made my way towards Adrian. I was crooning the second stanza when he leaned over and bit my neck. The bare side. I jumped, pretending to be shocked and appalled. I could hear the crowd enjoying the show.

  When the band began playing a calmer tune I called to our fans. “Alright Chicago, I think we could all use a round. So, who’s buying me a shot?” Fans greeted me with various screams and shouts, and after a moment I was reaching out to the crowd to grab four shot glasses. We cheered as we all met in the back where Mark was standing behind his drums to toast to a great opening show. I thanked the kind gentleman who bought us the drinks and asked him if he had a request. He shouted back for us to play ‘End It With A Love Song’, which was one of my favorites. I wrote it for our first album.

  The rest of our set went smoothly. I told the crowd goodnight and hurried off the stage. As I ran behind the curtain towards some fresh air, I ran straight into a hard, warm chest. I looked up and felt the heat rise to my face. Ethan was amused. I bet he was; I felt gross covered in sweat. I hated being hot and sticky like this. He smiled and stepped back. I could tell something in his mood had shifted from before our performance. My smile faded slowly. His pupils were huge. Was he high? He opened his mouth to say something but was interrupted by Sam, our band’s manager. The thin man in the gray suit and ridiculously thick blond hair came up, inserting himself between us.

  “Cleo! Great set, as usual. Can we talk?” He asked, already pushing me forward. Sam was nice, but stern. He was very no-nonsense. Directing us towards an office, Sam quickly closed the door behind him and turned to face me. I stood there uncomfortably before he grinned his smooth, conniving smile.

  “I have a proposition for you,” he said, shutting the door.

  “No. No way.” It was out of the question. I glared at Sam who rolled his eyes and leaned on the big desk behind him.

  “Come on Cleo. The label has been hounding me for years. This is the perfect time to do it. All in one go. Then when the tour is over you don’t even have to think about it ever again,” he argued.

  “Sam, I can’t. Chris would…” I started, but he blew me off.

  “Come on, that guy’s a piece of work I tell ya. This has potential. For everyone involved! This could be big, Cleo. Please, just think about it,” he pleaded, pressing his hands together to mimic praying. I put my hand to my forehead. This is all too much in one night. I sighed deeply again and glared up at Sam.

  “I’ll think about it. Let me talk to the guys. What about him? Did Ethan already say he’d do it?” Sam shrugged. He didn’t look worried. He never did. Sam was always one step ahead of us.

  “Their manager is going to discuss it with him. Honestly, we don’t really need the bands on board. The label only cares about getting you two,” he told me bluntly. Of course. I crossed my arms. In their eyes they could always replace the band behind the singer.

  “So, what would this entail exactly?” I asked, and he lit up like a kid on Christmas.

  “Okay, so first, record a duet. Either a love song or a breakup ballad. Your choice. If you guys can write one, good. If not, we can get something for you guys to perform. We have endless amounts of songwriters at our disposal.” I waved my hand at him to continue. We write our own stuff. Plain and simple.

  “Okay, then you do some hype about it. Perform it live a few times. Get the word out. Then we’ll shoot and release the music video. Perform it a few more times, and then you’re good to go back home to Mr. Senator,” he said, sarcasm dripping at the end of his pitch.

  “I don’t know. This is too weird,” I said, hesitant. Sam sighed again and crossed his arms.

  “Cleo, I’m not telling you to screw the guy. Just a few pecks for the video and sing with him. Jesus. You musicians are so difficult sometimes,” he joked, but I could see irritation behind that smile.

  “Fine, but I’ll write the song. I’m not singing some crap you pulled out of a folder full of pop songs for wannabe divas,” I told him. He straightened his posture and slapped his hands together.

  “Hot dog! Finally, something to give them! They were starting to really get on me. Now to get Andrews on board and we’ll start getting everything around.”

  “Why didn’t you approach me before the tour about this?” I asked him as we left the room, returning to the chaos backstage.

  “You didn’t even want to do the tour with him. I figured get you here, let you guys talk some stuff out and then convince you,” he grinned devilishly at me. I couldn’t keep from smiling, but I lightly shoved him. I glared at him but couldn’t stop a smile from peeking out. I could never stay mad at him. As stern as he was, he was a good manager and friend.

  By the time we came out of the office, Cruel Distraction was already on stage. That gave me a minute to find my bandmates and tell them what Sam had proposed. Of course, they were excited.

  “I want to help with the music,” Adrian said, which helped me get on board further. I couldn’t do anything without my best friends. I told them that, and we drank to it. We sat around backstage hanging out with some of the other bands while Cruel Distraction played their set. When they finished, we were signaled to join them on stage. I forced a smug smile and stormed onto the stage with my band. The crowd cheered. The singer from one of our openers came out with us. He reintroduced himself and reminded the fans to buy his cd.

  “Anyways, we’re gonna try to be fair, so I’ll be the judge. Who won the battle of the bands tonight?” He asked. A stagehand walked out with a ridiculously sparkly crown on a little red pillow.

  Judd, the singer, took the crown and went over to Ethan. He held it over his head and pointed the mic towards the crowd. Ethan smiled wide and bowed to the fans. They went wild with screams of adoration. He waited until it died down to walk over to me. Ethan was sticking his tongue out at me, while I remained cross-armed and impatient. When he came over and waved the crown over me, I moved forward and started jumping around, waving my hands, hyping the crowd up. They went berserk, and the winner became obvious.

  “Well, I think we have an answer. Sorry Cruel Distraction. Maria Maria, you are the winners of the battle of the bands tonight!” He shouted, and the crowd erupted. I thanked him and took the microphone. Derek and Adrian grabbed guitars quickly, while Mark ran to the drums. We played one more song as an encore. I thanked the crowd, motioning to my new crown, and bound off the stage.

  I sighed with relief that the concert was officially over. Phew, what a night. I looked back for my friends. They followed behind me, covered in sweat and grinning ear to ear. I laughed, knowing the feeling. The rush of adrenaline from performing, it was like nothing else. I looked for Ethan. Scanning backstage, I spotted him. He was shirtless. A flash memory of his shirtless body pressed against mine came to me. I quickly pushed it away. He had more tattoos than I remembered.

  I saw a man with a ponytail and long brown beard pass us and walk up to Ethan. He said something to him that made Ethan turn his head to look my way. My heart began beating furiously. Placing his hand on his back, the man led him away. I didn’t hear a word of what anyone said around me. My attention was focused on the door they had gone thro
ugh.

  After what felt like an eternity, they came out. Ethan was smiling weakly while the man looked quite excited. Ethan’s body was tense. Turning away quickly, I pretended to be engaged in what Spencer was telling us. We all laughed at his joke and then I felt a light tap on my shoulder. I turned around to see a grim-faced Ethan. My smile faltered.

  “Can we talk?” He asked quietly. I nodded, and we left out through the exit doors to the parking lot. People were all around. Stagehands, band members, bar staff, fans. There was no real privacy. He looked around and quickly grabbed my hand, pulling me towards the busses. My other hand went to my crown to keep it from falling. There were two actual tour buses, while everyone else would be providing their own transportation. He found a spot that wasn’t super busy and stopped. We stood in between our buses. Surprisingly no one was near. He dropped my hand and fell back, leaning against the cold metal of the bus. His head tilted down.

  Neither of us spoke for a moment. I stared at Ethan, but he refused to look at me. Finally lifting his head, his hard eyes softened and grew melancholy. “I kept it,” he said softly, his voice dripping with sorrow. I was on the verge of tears myself. I felt like such a jerk. I had agreed to make money on our pain… on his pain. I knew this was a bad idea.

  “I kept my tattoo because I thought that one day you would come back. And you had to have felt something for me because you kept yours too,” he accused. He was angry and hurt, and I was to blame. He was right; although I’d never say it. Reflexively I pushed my hair over my neck, covering it. He pushed off the bus and moved towards me.

  “I waited. For months. Every time my phone went off, I would hurry to pick it up hoping that it was you. That I finally got your attention!” My eyes widened, but I didn’t say anything. His face contorted with emotion and pent-up pain. He had been waiting years for this. “I just wanted you to notice me,” he said with a finality that brought me to tears. I was so sorry for what I had done to him. He wiped away some makeup, sweat, and tears from his face. His eyes swung back to mine and a chill went up my spine.

  I stepped back and hit the other bus. Ethan continued moving closer to me, pinning me against it. I heard the clink when the metal crown hit the metal bus. His icy blue eyes bore into me. He put his hand on my hip. I saw his eyes fall down to my lips. I felt his breath on my skin. My blood raced in my ears. He leaned down and just as our mouths were going to touch, he pulled away.

  “Is this something you’re comfortable with?” He whispered.

  “What do you mean?” I asked, confused. He looked at me with exasperation.

  “We’ll be on screen, kissing, touching. Cleo, memories are going to resurface, and that might not be a good thing,” he warned me. He was right again. I gulped and crossed my arms over my chest. The hand on my hip started creeping higher, teasing me. He played with the bottom of my shirt, his fingers slipping under, but remaining low. My skin burned from his touch. My body reacted before my brain. My back arched, my leg moved to let him between my legs. I gulped, seeing what he meant. But I still didn’t move away.

  “And what about your husband? You think he’s going to be okay with you pretending to be in love with your ex on camera? What’s he going to say?” He asked, his voice low, his lips under my chin. Suddenly he pulled entirely away from me. I straightened, pulling my shirt back down.

  “You said he was pretty understanding, but a guy can only take so much, Cleo. This isn’t as simple as just pretending. We have history and everyone knows that. There will be rumors, and the label is going to add fuel to the fire. They aren’t thinking of us. We’re just money tickets.” I turned my face away. I wasn’t going to cry in front of him. He was saying everything I had been thinking.

  “I'm not saying we shouldn’t. This would be great for both of our careers, but you need to know what we are getting ourselves into. If you don’t want to, that’s fine. They asked me, and I was on the fence already. I would understand. Our history is too much.”

  “Ethan, I can’t think about this right now.” I closed my eyes. My mind flooded with images of my husband. The last time I saw him. It was a rush of emotions I couldn’t, no, didn’t want to deal with right now. When a tear slipped, I put my hands to my face. I felt the crown slip off my head and hit the pavement with a tiny clink. I didn’t look towards it or make any movement to pick it up. Speechless, he stood there, letting me cry.

  “Cleo, I didn’t mean to upset you. I’m just unsure of all this,” he tried to explain.

  “He’s cheating on me!” I blurted. I burst into tears and slipped down to the pavement. He instantly dropped down to crouch next to me. I cried into my knees not looking up.

  I heard a door open and people talking. I pulled my head up and stood up quickly. Ethan tried to touch my back, but I pulled away.

  “I don’t need your pity. I bet you’re happy. It’s what I get, right?” I spat at him. He sighed and looked at me one last time with those damn blue eyes. His makeup was smeared all down his face. He opened and shut his mouth quickly like he was fighting with himself over whether or not to say something.

  Wiping the tears from my eyes and cheeks, I brushed past him and stormed onto the bus. I laid down on my bunk and closed the curtain. I didn’t want anyone to see me crying. I grabbed my phone and saw that I had two messages. One from Sam and one from Chris. I opened the one from my husband first.

  Cleo talk to me. I miss you. I don’t like being away from you for so long. I’m lonely.

  I felt a twinge of guilt. It was hard being in a relationship with someone who travels for work. Did I throw Christopher into the arms of a stranger? Was it my fault he found company in someone else? I didn’t reply to his message. I couldn’t right now. The memory of his naked body entangled in hers was still too fresh.

  It was a few weeks before the tour. I had been at Derek’s getting our set list hammered out. We went out for food and I wanted to stop by my house to pick up my songbook. I had something I wanted to show the band.

  We stopped by and I hurried inside. I realized that Christopher’s black BMW was here. He worked long hours at his law firm, so I was excited to catch him home. I called his name as I walked around, but the house was quiet. I climbed the stairs and went to our bedroom for my book. Pushing the door open I froze.

  In an instant my life as I knew it completely shattered. There he was, his bare ass in the air. They didn’t see me at first, but then she opened her eyes and screamed. Chris whipped around and tried to cover them, but it was too late. There was no denying what they were doing.

  I grabbed my songbook from the table right next to the door and left, tossing my ring on the kitchen table. I hadn’t been home since.

  I closed my eyes and tried to calm myself. I wiped my face off and took a few deep breaths. You know what? Screw it. Apparently he didn’t care about my feelings. I pulled the curtain open and stood up. Moving to the front, I saw that my friends were back on the bus now. Smoke was clouding the room.

  I saw all of my guys were sprawled on the couches drinking and passing a joint around. No sooner had I come into the lounge area the door swung open and Spencer, Christian, and Seth came in holding liquor bottles. They quickly joined the rest of the guys. The bus was packed. This was going to be my summer. This was where I was most comfortable. I didn’t want to go home to Christopher. It was too late.

  “How’s it going?” Derek asked Christian. The other band was grinning and covered in sweat and grime. I scanned the room but didn’t see Ethan in the mess of men. Adrian grabbed me, pulling me down onto his lap. I let out a yelp, as he kissed me.

  “Oh I love ya Darlin’,” he said with a hiccup. I wiped my mouth with the back of my hand and wiggled to get up. He tasted like dark beer.

  “Hey, I have something for ya,” he said.

  I heard another voice I couldn't identify say “I have something for you too!” Followed by more hoots and hollers.

  Adrian stood up and pulled out a brand new bottle of tequila from u
nder him. I snatched it out of his hands and thanked him. I left the party and went back to the sleeping quarters. Taking clothes out of my trunk, I went to wash up as best I could in the bathroom. Pulling on some pajama pants and a tank top, I went back to the front to see how long we had left before we started driving. Less than an hour and we’d be off the driver, Bill, told me. He was about to start counting heads, so I better stay close.

  I thanked him and decided to go look for Ethan. Mark was the closest to me. He asked if I was going outside. I told him I was and, without hesitation, he pulled off his black hoodie and gave it to me. I loved my guys. I blew him a kiss and he rolled his eyes. I saw a tiny smile cross his face as I bounced down the stairs.

  The party on the other bus was just as loud, but there were some stragglers outside. I ignored some catcalls and focused on the task at hand. Looking around, I saw some of the crew finishing up. This was the first tour where we didn’t have to load out our equipment, so I took a walk around. It was nice not having to carry all the heavy instruments and amps and stuff it into a trailer. It was even sweeter having my own bunk and not sleeping either in the passenger seat or leaning on Derek or Adrian and praying no one had gas. This bus was already trashed, but it was so much better than before. I would never complain again.

  I wasn’t going to admit I was looking for him, but sure enough, he startled me when he stepped out from behind the building. He sauntered over with one hand in his pocket and the other behind his back. I noticed he had put his shirt back on, but I was cold even with Mark’s hoodie. He had to be freezing.

  “You look lost,” he said, an amused look on his face. His lips curved into a goofy smile and his eyes were dark and slightly bloodshot. The thought crossed my mind that he was high again, but I tossed it away. I had to focus.

  “I’m in if you’re in,” I said, as confidently as I could. Ethan paused, letting it sink in before smiling wide. He took a drag of the cigarette I hadn’t noticed before.